I feel so tempted to start this blog entry out as, "Are you there God? It's me, Margaret." If you are a Judy Blume fan like myself, then you totally get where I am heading. If you are not, then I really have no idea how you made it through your childhood and I have probably already lost you.
Any-hoo, its been an unbelievable year, and I am past due an "update:"
We just hit our "1 year" of opening mark, which fell on Jan. 3rd, but we are celebrating in store on Feb. 6th (yay!! Store sales and door prizes in the works, btw.) This year has been crazy exciting. We killed our yearly sales goal in 3rd quarter, won Chattanooga's Times Free Press "Best of the Best" antique store in the area, and we are fortunate to have a list of talent waiting to come onboard. (<--------- the toot, toot part)
Insanity. I am so thankful and grateful for our wonderful vendors who have poured so much time, money, creativity, and ENERGY into making Vinterest successful. I am equally thankful and grateful to our amazing customer base who chooses to come stroll the aisles of Vinterest- the ones who let us kiss their babies, allows the Mr. to make up "nicknames" for our repeat offenders, and then choose to spend their hard-earned money with us. Truly thankful. Without vendors and customers, there would be no Vinterest. We totally get it.
People have asked me, "would you do anything differently?" And I have to say, not much. If I could change anything, I would just call us "Vinterest." The Mr. disagrees and loves the ring "antiques" brings to the end of our name. Sometimes I wonder if it would have made a difference?! For example, if we had come to the community, posted a sign with just "Vinterest" with our tag line, "Where Artisans and Pickers gather," would people have still "gotten" what we were about?! Would it had made any difference?? (Seriously- I'm curious what you think!?! Post your opinion in comments!)
Now, as I'm sure most of you know, we never intended to be primarily an antique store. What we intended for was to have diversity and to provide an additional outlet for local artisans to feature their wares that would be available to them other than sitting in the heat or freezing cold at a market festival somewhere. We also wanted to provide a place for folks to sell their vintage and antique finds. Personally, I think we nailed it. 2 folks on Google Reviews disagree. (This is where I insert a shameless plug that if you AGREE we nailed it, please go to Google Reviews and let folks know. If you DISAGREE, please do not go to Google Reviews....haha. Is this a legal request?!? haha. Don't report me to "google police, please.) Anyways, we are so proud of whats been accomplished in the City of Hixson.
With all that "tooting" behind me, this year hasn't been without heartbreak, which I accept is just life. There's not a moment that I don't wish to be able to pick up the phone and call my mama and tell her all the good news. Mom, as many of you already know if you have followed me, has Alzheimers and is in one of the latter stages. Paul lost his mom several years to Pancreatic Cancer, and I know he aches to speak to his mama as well. I feel fortunate that I can still travel and visit mine each week in Nashville, although she doesn't know who I am. Oh, and boy do I miss my mama when it comes to handling the critics. My mama could become "Mama Bear" quick-like. I miss her. It's funny how grief works like that: it happens during good times and bad.
Anyhow, as we look ahead in 2016 and the future of Vinterest, our mission is to stay the course of doing what we can to contribute to the local community wherever we can. We want to keep Vinterest a consistently fun and inspiring place for folks to come and enjoy (and occasionally escape life from with some "retail therapy.") We want to continue to help folks grow their small business dreams. We also "may" have a few surprises up our sleeves to be revealed in the upcoming months. I hope you come share in the excitement. Bring the family, and see you soon!
Saturday, January 30, 2016
Saturday, February 28, 2015
FAQ
If I was to create a "FAQ" section for Vinterest Antiques, I think one of our top 5 questions that I get asked, right after "How much are booths here?" "How do I get on the waiting list?," "Where did you move the dog food?" and "How did y'all come up with this idea?" (just about all answered on our Website)....is "where do you guys find all this stuff?"
My answer is always, "everywhere."
It's not uncommon for hard core "pickers" to circle once or twice by a dumpster or purposely take a side road the night before trash pick-up seeking inventory. I once found the most amazing pair of 8' tall wooden doors sitting by our neighborhood Outback restaurant that I flipped for a quick $200.
Many of us vehemently troll Craigslist day and night, are members of several Facebook yard sale sites, are "friends" with estate sales planners, and sit hours (and I mean countless H-O-U-R-S) several times a week at a local auction often competing with our friends for that special treasure- sometimes to only leave empty handed.
We often travel far out into God's country to shop places we refer as "honey holes" that look condemned just to sort through piles of dust and filth to find that "item."
The Mr. and I have taken a shovel, a BB gun and gloves to venture out into the woods to an old trash pile, climbing under barbwire fences, watching intensely for snakes, to dig through compost for old glass milk and medicine bottles. (If you have one of these old trash piles buried on your property- call us! We're game!)
We often stalk "newbie" pickers who price way too low in order to find our inventory. We know how to power walk to a yard-sale and our children (and my step-son) knows to buckle up, no questions asked, when it's game-on, yard-sale time. Countless times, I've dug in the middle of the night by flashlight in storage units.
It's not always glamorous.
"Hi!," I say in my sweetest voice while the Mr. sits in the running truck, "I was hoping you may be interested in selling me your glider."
I cannot tell you how many times in my lifetime I've just about pee'd on myself by sticking my hand into a box filled with cast-away junk, digging to find a hidden treasure, only to scare the be-jesus out of myself by pulling up something completely unexpected, such as an old fishing-lure worm.
Once, up in the mountains, I got chased off a man's front porch when I bravely entered through the gate into his fenced front yard, knocking on his front door uninvited on a Saturday morning to beg him to sell me the old vintage metal glider that was rusting away in his front yard, and sitting right beside a toilette bowl.
"Hi!," I say in my sweetest voice while the Mr. sits in the running truck, "I was hoping you may be interested in selling me your glider."
Without hesitation he says in his not so sweet voice, "Nope!!," then the door was slammed in my face.
"But, I'll give you $100!!!!"
Door opens and then the dog is let out, as I quickly make an exit. Oops. The signs were all there, but that GLIDER. I MUST SAVE THE GLIDER!!! (I have not given up hope!)
Pickin' is sometimes a test of your faith. It's sometimes a matter of how far are you willing to go??
On a recent picking trip from Chattanooga to Texas, the Mr. and I decided to go rouge and pull off the main road and drive some side roads seeking yard sales. We found ourself in a little neighborhood, chasing down a yard-sale trail in a neighborhood with houses 1,000 sq. ft. or less. When we finally found the yard sale, we were met with a little sign that read, "Yard sale behind house, located inside." Maybe it was Texas, but without even saying a word to each other, nearly synchronized, we pulled out our holstered pistols from out of the glovebox and under the seat and discreetly concealed them under our shirts before walking inside. Once in, we found ourself in a small kitchen with 2 seemingly sweet ladies who did not speak English and a baby to find 1 folding table of used plastic food containers. After first a good laugh, we were off to the next one.
I have not met a yard-sale yet that scared me off.
Oh, but that moment....that glorious moment where you dig through rubbish to find underneath a pile of old encyclopedias and VHS tapes, to uncover in its glory that precious Pyrex bowl. "How much for this?," you say in your most calm voice possible through the junk-drunk shakes, and then the owner tells you that you can have it for $1. "Score!!!!" Those are the moments that I LIVE for.
The picking.... the true picking. That's my drug of choice!
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
I must say NO to good ideas.
With the recent deterioration of my mother, I am committed to drive every Monday night from Chattanooga to Hendersonville, Tenn., so that I can spend all day Tuesday with her. I am so thankful to be in a position with Vinterest Antiques to do so. This time with her has become precious.
I think one of the most difficult things to do when trying to execute any type of "business plan" is learning to deal with all the distractions that cause us to take our eyes off the main purpose and vision. So, with that being said, one thing that the Mr. and I have to constantly challenge each other on is on our abilities to say "no."
(As a side note: he has gotten really good at telling me no and I think has reached "expert level." I, on the other hand, have not mastered the art. For example, I would have a complete FARM, complete with chickens, pot-belly pigs and lots of goats in my backyard if I could. Why should it matter that I live in a subdivision!? That's the real reason for tall privacy fences, right?! To keep the neighbors out?? ha!)
Anyways, there are countless business-type blogs, articles, webinars, business books, videos, conferences, (you name it,) on the simple art of utilizing the two-letter word, "no." All because we, as a society, are terrible at it. Yet, failure of the ability to say "no" poses great risk to a business's success.
Alas! If that isn't painful enough, in executing "saying no" effectively, it typically returns very little immediate reward and/or satisfaction. It can cause conflict and hurt feelings with people. And, quite frankly, our "flesh" hates saying "no" and especially being told "no."
So, let me be real with you and "very classy" for a moment (tongue in cheek) and say how I really feel:
Saying "no" sucks.
Ugh, but I know if we are to take Vinterest Antiques's future from "good" to "great," I must get over this. Like, quickly. And, guess what..... Unless you are like my husband, you probably do too.
Here's the problem: the Mr. and I, between us, have had probably 1,000 good ideas about our future and Vinterest; however, it would be very difficult to execute every good idea that pops up, and even if we tried, it is nearly statistically impossible to execute every idea very well.
These ideas can range from what product lines to carry, what vendors to bring onboard, who to conduct business with, how much labor to spend, how much to invest in advertising and with who, where and how, all the way down to the smallest details of what we should sell on our front register counter and what candle to burn in the restroom. Then, there is complex ideas such as long-term strategy and growth. Add on top of this aforementioned problem, there are 1,000 more good ideas and suggestions that we've received from people, who all have good intentions, that we must carefully evaluate and not grow distracted by.
In the end, I have learned that all decisions have to be made with 2 things in mind: ROI (return on investment) regarding how and on what we spend our money AND our time and 2) is this getting us closer to where we want to be, achieve and be known for?!
5 hours of alone time in the car per week may not be enough.
Anyways, with all that being said, in our worlds that we live in, whether you are a business owner like me, the President of the United States or the CEO of your family, the problem is definitely not us being short of having good ideas.
What the problem is, however, is having the ability to be able to be self controlled enough to say "no" to a good idea, so we can get focused back on and have enough energy and resources to say "yes" to a great one, so as to be able to execute the hell out of it!
So, tonight, for those who are "yes" people, I leave you with a link to one of the greatest examples I can think of that whose success was partly made by his ability to say no, Mr. Steve Jobs. And I leave you with this question: when's the last time you said "NO" to a good idea?
It takes approximately 2 1/2 hours from doorstep to doorstep, one-way, and typically a lot longer as I have a few "pickin'" spots that I like to hit along the way.
Apart from the obvious and very personal reasons Monday nights and Tuesdays are important, the drive time alone in the car has also become extremely valuable and is quickly becoming an intricate part of Vinterest's business-growth model and strategy. This quiet time gives me a moment away from distractions, including distractions that I cause myself, so that I can reflect, strategize and simply re-focus.
I think one of the most difficult things to do when trying to execute any type of "business plan" is learning to deal with all the distractions that cause us to take our eyes off the main purpose and vision. So, with that being said, one thing that the Mr. and I have to constantly challenge each other on is on our abilities to say "no."
(As a side note: he has gotten really good at telling me no and I think has reached "expert level." I, on the other hand, have not mastered the art. For example, I would have a complete FARM, complete with chickens, pot-belly pigs and lots of goats in my backyard if I could. Why should it matter that I live in a subdivision!? That's the real reason for tall privacy fences, right?! To keep the neighbors out?? ha!)
Anyways, there are countless business-type blogs, articles, webinars, business books, videos, conferences, (you name it,) on the simple art of utilizing the two-letter word, "no." All because we, as a society, are terrible at it. Yet, failure of the ability to say "no" poses great risk to a business's success.
Alas! If that isn't painful enough, in executing "saying no" effectively, it typically returns very little immediate reward and/or satisfaction. It can cause conflict and hurt feelings with people. And, quite frankly, our "flesh" hates saying "no" and especially being told "no."
So, let me be real with you and "very classy" for a moment (tongue in cheek) and say how I really feel:
Saying "no" sucks.
Ugh, but I know if we are to take Vinterest Antiques's future from "good" to "great," I must get over this. Like, quickly. And, guess what..... Unless you are like my husband, you probably do too.
Here's the problem: the Mr. and I, between us, have had probably 1,000 good ideas about our future and Vinterest; however, it would be very difficult to execute every good idea that pops up, and even if we tried, it is nearly statistically impossible to execute every idea very well.
These ideas can range from what product lines to carry, what vendors to bring onboard, who to conduct business with, how much labor to spend, how much to invest in advertising and with who, where and how, all the way down to the smallest details of what we should sell on our front register counter and what candle to burn in the restroom. Then, there is complex ideas such as long-term strategy and growth. Add on top of this aforementioned problem, there are 1,000 more good ideas and suggestions that we've received from people, who all have good intentions, that we must carefully evaluate and not grow distracted by.
In the end, I have learned that all decisions have to be made with 2 things in mind: ROI (return on investment) regarding how and on what we spend our money AND our time and 2) is this getting us closer to where we want to be, achieve and be known for?!
5 hours of alone time in the car per week may not be enough.
Anyways, with all that being said, in our worlds that we live in, whether you are a business owner like me, the President of the United States or the CEO of your family, the problem is definitely not us being short of having good ideas.
What the problem is, however, is having the ability to be able to be self controlled enough to say "no" to a good idea, so we can get focused back on and have enough energy and resources to say "yes" to a great one, so as to be able to execute the hell out of it!
So, tonight, for those who are "yes" people, I leave you with a link to one of the greatest examples I can think of that whose success was partly made by his ability to say no, Mr. Steve Jobs. And I leave you with this question: when's the last time you said "NO" to a good idea?
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Taylor Swift says "Shake it off!"
So, I am having an absolute blast at Vinterest Antiques now that the "kinks" are getting ironed out, booths are fully rented, and customers are giving me some peace of mind that they will actually show up! ha! (Seriously, there were days during the construction phase that I was freaking out, scared out of my mind that people wouldn't know about us, much less come out and shop.) Tomorrow marks 1 week of being open. Yay! And come shop with us, you did!!!
At night, I like to reflect and think about all the things we've had thrown at us since starting this venture. In fact, just in the past 30 days, we've battled the flu x2, a series of sinus infections, a leak in the ceiling, a rusted fire exit/panic door stuck to the floor that was dead bolted shut (now fixed,) and our home's heater stop working (due to my puppy, Jake, getting under the house through a crawl space and eating the duct work. Yes, that really happened.)
That's the short list, but I'm sure if I threw my "short list" in a pile with your "short list," I'd probably want mine back. So, I'm very thankful that's all we've experienced thus far.
Alas! Since coming to Hixson, there hasn't been any shortage of drama, but fortunately NOT on "our side of the river." There's been some accidental insults (I think the Lord wants me to give benefit of the doubt) with people who don't know us, and there's been funny situations where people don't realize Paul and I are the owners. I'm not sure who they are expecting, but for some of the folks who don't read our blog or follow us on FB, it's not us. I also don't think people expect to find us running the cash register or hauling furniture. Or maybe it's the purple hair?! Who knows. It makes me smile.
[As a side note, for those NOT in the Chattanooga area, the "river" is a very big deal. Like huge deal! I didn't really realize how huge until a lady made it very clear to me that she "never" crosses the river for anyone or anything, but she did just to see what all the fuss was about. You see, there is a bridge over a dam that must be crossed to get to us from Chattanooga/Knoxville. I haven't quite pieced it all together as to why that's a big deal, so if someone would like to enlighten me, please do. But for now, let's leave it as a huge deal and we are very thankful to those who have "crossed" the river for us! ("Crossing the river," by the way, has given us a GREAT t-shirt idea!! So stay tuned.)]
Anyways, I will admit, in my exhaustion, there have been days that I've had to "check" myself and my attitude a couple of times, such as the time a lady said, "I've been doing this a lot longer than you have" when discussing renting a booth with me, and she didn't agree with some of our policies. "Swallow. My. Pride, and grin and nod, Katherine. Grin and nod," I have to remind myself.
As another example, Day 2 of being opened, I had a sweet Veteran go a little crazy on me due to how an American flag was displayed in our store (hung, not touching floor, nor no rips/tears) which left me a tad bit dazed and confused, and all I could think to say was, "thank you for your service." Oh, and I heard a rumor "allegedly" started by another business owner that, while we were in the process of renting out booths, that I "snuck" into this person's antique store and snapped a "photo" of a "top secret" clipboard that had all their vendors phone numbers as to "steal" them.
We also had a totally different situation where we were told by a reliable source that another store (in a different state) was trying to get ahold of us because they wanted to plug in and sell with us and advertise, so the Mr. immediately called them as soon as we were told. He spoke to one of the owners (excitedly, because this partnership would be HUGE and very powerful,) and the owner bashed us and called us just about everything but a white person before hanging up. Oops! (And, I LOVE this store!!!)
This, I kid you not, is our life. I cannot make this stuff up, but I am so thankful because it sure does make for some funny stories around the kitchen table!
"Shake it off," says Taylor Swift, so "shake it off" I will!!
That's the crazy .001% part of this venture that would make for some pretty entertaining reality TV I do believe (HGTV- call me!)
The other 99.999% part of our experience thus far has been truly joyous and has God's hands all in what we are trying to accomplish. We are surrounded with some of the most giving, supportive vendors and customers. Every day, it is a complete joy to wake up and "go to work."
So tonight, I want to thank you for "crossing the river" and visiting with our little Vinterest Antiques family.
I hope when you come to Vinterest, you leave with a smile!
At night, I like to reflect and think about all the things we've had thrown at us since starting this venture. In fact, just in the past 30 days, we've battled the flu x2, a series of sinus infections, a leak in the ceiling, a rusted fire exit/panic door stuck to the floor that was dead bolted shut (now fixed,) and our home's heater stop working (due to my puppy, Jake, getting under the house through a crawl space and eating the duct work. Yes, that really happened.)
That's the short list, but I'm sure if I threw my "short list" in a pile with your "short list," I'd probably want mine back. So, I'm very thankful that's all we've experienced thus far.
Alas! Since coming to Hixson, there hasn't been any shortage of drama, but fortunately NOT on "our side of the river." There's been some accidental insults (I think the Lord wants me to give benefit of the doubt) with people who don't know us, and there's been funny situations where people don't realize Paul and I are the owners. I'm not sure who they are expecting, but for some of the folks who don't read our blog or follow us on FB, it's not us. I also don't think people expect to find us running the cash register or hauling furniture. Or maybe it's the purple hair?! Who knows. It makes me smile.
[As a side note, for those NOT in the Chattanooga area, the "river" is a very big deal. Like huge deal! I didn't really realize how huge until a lady made it very clear to me that she "never" crosses the river for anyone or anything, but she did just to see what all the fuss was about. You see, there is a bridge over a dam that must be crossed to get to us from Chattanooga/Knoxville. I haven't quite pieced it all together as to why that's a big deal, so if someone would like to enlighten me, please do. But for now, let's leave it as a huge deal and we are very thankful to those who have "crossed" the river for us! ("Crossing the river," by the way, has given us a GREAT t-shirt idea!! So stay tuned.)]
Anyways, I will admit, in my exhaustion, there have been days that I've had to "check" myself and my attitude a couple of times, such as the time a lady said, "I've been doing this a lot longer than you have" when discussing renting a booth with me, and she didn't agree with some of our policies. "Swallow. My. Pride, and grin and nod, Katherine. Grin and nod," I have to remind myself.
As another example, Day 2 of being opened, I had a sweet Veteran go a little crazy on me due to how an American flag was displayed in our store (hung, not touching floor, nor no rips/tears) which left me a tad bit dazed and confused, and all I could think to say was, "thank you for your service." Oh, and I heard a rumor "allegedly" started by another business owner that, while we were in the process of renting out booths, that I "snuck" into this person's antique store and snapped a "photo" of a "top secret" clipboard that had all their vendors phone numbers as to "steal" them.
We also had a totally different situation where we were told by a reliable source that another store (in a different state) was trying to get ahold of us because they wanted to plug in and sell with us and advertise, so the Mr. immediately called them as soon as we were told. He spoke to one of the owners (excitedly, because this partnership would be HUGE and very powerful,) and the owner bashed us and called us just about everything but a white person before hanging up. Oops! (And, I LOVE this store!!!)
This, I kid you not, is our life. I cannot make this stuff up, but I am so thankful because it sure does make for some funny stories around the kitchen table!
"Shake it off," says Taylor Swift, so "shake it off" I will!!
That's the crazy .001% part of this venture that would make for some pretty entertaining reality TV I do believe (HGTV- call me!)
The other 99.999% part of our experience thus far has been truly joyous and has God's hands all in what we are trying to accomplish. We are surrounded with some of the most giving, supportive vendors and customers. Every day, it is a complete joy to wake up and "go to work."
So tonight, I want to thank you for "crossing the river" and visiting with our little Vinterest Antiques family.
I hope when you come to Vinterest, you leave with a smile!
Sunday, January 4, 2015
Why shop "small"
The Mr. and I literally entered last night into what I think may have been a slight coma post our initial grand opening. Leading up to the morning, I worried and played out in my mind just about every bad scenario that could happen. Luckily, the only thing that I noticed that came close to "bad" happening was that the manager from Steak N Shake (our neighbor) was upset because we ran out of parking spots and people used their back parking lot. I'll take that "problem" any day!! ha! (For the record, we buy something from Steak N Shake nearly daily. Seriously. I think they may have accidentally "forgotten" about that on Jan. 3rd.....But I digress.....)
The day was a HUGE success. Everything went smooth like butter, and we had the best people possible surrounding us.
I often post on Facebook to "shop small" or "buy local," and I just assume that people "get" why that's so important. You know what assuming does, right??? So, I want to break it down and perhaps give someone a new perspective. This is also why I don't mind the long hours and perhaps why I think about our responsibility at Vinterest Antiques as my "ministry."
When you shop stores and places like Vinterest Antiques in Hixson, Tenn., University Pickers in Huntsville, Ala., Chatt-R-Bug in Chattanooga, Tenn., or Marietta Antique Mall in Marietta, Ga., let me explain what you are actually doing...
Stores like these (and there are 1,000's more throughout and I'm sure one in your city) give folks (your neighbors) from all different walks of life a place to make some money. When shopping small, think about Kate who is a mother of twins who makes and sells beautiful jewelry so she can bring in extra income; think of Jennifer, a single mom of two little girls, who lives in a small apartment, works full time at a highly demanding job, and then comes home to paint her furniture at night in order to provide a better life for her girls; think about Karen, a 67 year old grandmother, who also lives on the 3rd story of an apartment, who spent over 30 years working at the post office and is now retired, who lugs up 3 flights of stairs cast-away furniture that she reupholsters and brings back to life to supplement her retirement. Those are just some reasons to shop small business.
For some, selling at a place like ours is actually NOT about the money at all. For some, its a way to bring families together, like the brother/sister who have a booth together, whose relationship is rekindling after the loss of their father. Think also about the mother and adult son who now create beautiful pieces of furniture together and for once, have "something" to really talk and get excited about. It about makes me cry when I think about my own family, and how it's brought my father and I closer as I text him "Pinterest" photos, and he figures out how to make it happen, then I get to help him sell it.
For others, this "venture" is a way to nurture their creativity and gives them a stress-reducing outlet. So when you buy from a small business, think also about how you could be buying from a preacher who prays for and listens to "other people's" problems all day long, and this gives him an outlet so he can have time to relax his mind and enjoy some quiet time alone while rejuvenating his spirit through reviving furniture rejects; think about the Dr. who hears complaining all day long or the "IT Manager" who stares at a computer screen for 9 hours a day. When you buy from these folks, you are literally filling their life with joy and purpose.
This are just "some" of the reasons that I encourage you to consider buying from small business when you can. I think this picture floating around sums it up perfectly:
I would love to hear from you! Why do you think it's important to buy from small business??
I would love to hear from you! Why do you think it's important to buy from small business??
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Forgiveness
So, right now, considering we've invited 60+ people to our warehouse at 3:00 for a meeting today, I should be cleaning. Instead, I have got to get this story out today so I can "carry on and be awesome" (stole that line from a cheap poster I saw at Walmart last night.)
Yesterday evening, after 1 (maybe 2) swigs of Tennessee Jack Daniels whiskey (with honey,) I realized how much anger and resentment I have been carrying in my heart towards a certain someone.[If you want the juicy details, you are reading the wrong blog post.]
On a side note, if by now you haven't noticed, I will write about Jesus and Tennessee whiskey from time to time. You can totally judge me if you want, considering I typically ask you to reserve such judgement. Sipping a nip of whiskey runs deep in my family, especially when you've been battling a cough like I have. I highly recommend it when you are sick.
Anyways, back to the deep, rooted anger part....
I have been down right PO'd at a certain someone who hurt me deeply. I've not been exactly quiet about my disdain but have worked really, really hard to not sow discord.
As Paul and I are preparing for this next new chapter of Vinterest Antiques, and I hear all the sweet comments and encouraging words from friends and new friends we've made in the process, I get a ton of motivation. It also, however, puts a lot of pressure on an ole' guy and gal like the Mr. and I to succeed. So, we both take this opportunity we've been given very seriously. After all, we are "going for broke," so I treat it like a God-given responsibility that Paul and I have been given to help change lives (including our own.)
So last night, as I was laying in bed and was reading some previous blogs and comments, there it was.... a correspondence between this person and I almost exactly 2 years ago. In this exchange, we were lifting each other up in Christ.
Honestly, I thought I had deleted any history of this person in my life (including comments.)
My heart then whispered, "you will never achieve all that I have planned for you until you release the resentment that's living in your heart because you're making it hard for me to live there too."
I knew right then what I needed to do.
So I wrote her, copying the correspondence, and told her I was hurt and angry but meant what I said when I prayed for her God-given dreams to come true then (in 2013) and I just wanted her to know that I meant it still today.
She sent back a response, and I sent back a short response, and years of hurt and resentment ended just like that with just a simple emoticon smiley face.
Matthew 11: 25- And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
We will never be friends again, but through that simple exchange, the chains that I didn't know even existed busted loose around my heart.
With all that said, I found the following quote from Marianne Williamson that I believe ties the bow on my story on forgiveness. If like me, you are struggling with forgiveness as well, leave a comment! I will pray for you to get your moment soon when you realize it's time. You don't have to go into specifics, but I think acknowledging it's there is step 1 to peace.
Now, we can all "carry on and be awesome!"
Yesterday evening, after 1 (maybe 2) swigs of Tennessee Jack Daniels whiskey (with honey,) I realized how much anger and resentment I have been carrying in my heart towards a certain someone.[If you want the juicy details, you are reading the wrong blog post.]
On a side note, if by now you haven't noticed, I will write about Jesus and Tennessee whiskey from time to time. You can totally judge me if you want, considering I typically ask you to reserve such judgement. Sipping a nip of whiskey runs deep in my family, especially when you've been battling a cough like I have. I highly recommend it when you are sick.
Anyways, back to the deep, rooted anger part....
I have been down right PO'd at a certain someone who hurt me deeply. I've not been exactly quiet about my disdain but have worked really, really hard to not sow discord.
As Paul and I are preparing for this next new chapter of Vinterest Antiques, and I hear all the sweet comments and encouraging words from friends and new friends we've made in the process, I get a ton of motivation. It also, however, puts a lot of pressure on an ole' guy and gal like the Mr. and I to succeed. So, we both take this opportunity we've been given very seriously. After all, we are "going for broke," so I treat it like a God-given responsibility that Paul and I have been given to help change lives (including our own.)
So last night, as I was laying in bed and was reading some previous blogs and comments, there it was.... a correspondence between this person and I almost exactly 2 years ago. In this exchange, we were lifting each other up in Christ.
Honestly, I thought I had deleted any history of this person in my life (including comments.)
My heart then whispered, "you will never achieve all that I have planned for you until you release the resentment that's living in your heart because you're making it hard for me to live there too."
I knew right then what I needed to do.
So I wrote her, copying the correspondence, and told her I was hurt and angry but meant what I said when I prayed for her God-given dreams to come true then (in 2013) and I just wanted her to know that I meant it still today.
She sent back a response, and I sent back a short response, and years of hurt and resentment ended just like that with just a simple emoticon smiley face.
Matthew 11: 25- And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
We will never be friends again, but through that simple exchange, the chains that I didn't know even existed busted loose around my heart.
With all that said, I found the following quote from Marianne Williamson that I believe ties the bow on my story on forgiveness. If like me, you are struggling with forgiveness as well, leave a comment! I will pray for you to get your moment soon when you realize it's time. You don't have to go into specifics, but I think acknowledging it's there is step 1 to peace.
Now, we can all "carry on and be awesome!"
Thursday, December 25, 2014
Applause
I've always admired the folks in this world who do not live for an applause. The ones who quietly disappear, virtually unnoticed, and are later found doing thankless acts of kindness. I know that you know these types of "ladies and men" that I'm talking about, and perhaps you are one. These are the folks who clean the dishes after a party, keep your breakroom's trash can emptied, and is the little fairy that keeps a can of "Glade" in your company's restroom. Most of these folks aren't found on social media, and if they are, their profile picture is probably a baby animal, a child or blank. Quite simply, these folks make the world a better, kinder place. They are angels on earth who don't like their photo taken or name etched in a plaque.
I, self-admittedly, am not one of these folks.
I'm going to blame it on my parents for having me 10 years after my middle sister, 15 years after my oldest, thus making me the baby of the family.
I didn't grow up rich, but I was definitely spoiled rotten with attention. As a baby, my chubby thighs stayed bruised because people just couldn't resist squeezing them. My dad left for work every morning at 5AM for 30+ years, yet never missed a single ballgame and rarely a practice. Mom once got us kicked out of basketball game because she didn't like how the coach was yelling at me, and I lasted with my original Kindergarden teacher only one day when she opted to call me "Kathy," instead of Katherine on the first day of school. My sweet mama could go from a smiling Southern Belle to a scary Mama Bear in a split second- bless her heart.
With that being said, I have had to work on not being an overly-sensitive, "let's-take-a-selfie," self-indulgent, borderline narcissist, "why not me," and "I'm going to tell my mama," attention-seeking brat. (It's a work in progress.) I will toot my own horn and shamelessly do a dance in the end zone, while saying "in your face!" after winning a game of Monopoly. And I sometimes wonder why people don't like me?!?
Ok. That's not entirely true, as I cannot recall ever winning a game of Monopoly. I am, however, very competitive and like to be rewarded for my hard work and having an audience watch doesn't make me at all nervous.
In fact, I recall more embarrassing moments occurring in my life on a stage, basketball court or softball field with lots of people watching than those of bright, shining moments. For example, I once went in for a layup to only run straight into the rolling basketball rack with 10+ basketballs on it, making way for them to be completely scattered throughout the gym and for me to be face-planted on the gym floor with a gym full of people. This was the longest 10 mins of my life. I survived.
So back to this "need for attention" thing....it's not about a need for others or the world to watch me "succeed." It's truly not about being #1, "the best," or an insatiable desire for attention.
Not to get sappy, but what it actually boils down to is the dopamine rush I get when I look up and see that what I've done has made my biggest fans proud- my parents. That's what provides me the biggest sense of accomplishment and feeling of success. This need for approval has pushed me many times forward.
As we are creeping up on a little over a week away from the grand opening of Vinterest Antiques, I realize my biggest fans may not show up in the audience for the first time ever. It's not because they don't want to. It's just because they can't- physically. I have to be prepared for that.
And, at 35 years old, my friends, I realize that I am going to have to learn to give to myself the applause that I have relied on from family my entire life.
There are still people who won't like "Katherine" and there's still going to be jerks who think they can talk to me however they want. There are still bullies on the playground and life is much more populated with competitors than fans. I must come to grips with that there will never be any other person on this earth who will root for me, right or wrong, like my parents did.
I may still fall straight on my face, and people may point and laugh at me, and I am going to have to find the courage and strength to stand up on my own two feet and try again. No one in this life is going to come running anymore to protect me.
Alas! I must not forget that I have a wonderful partner in Paul.
I must also not forget that this fear and anxiety does not come from above. The noise and negativity and fleeting thoughts of doubt are not part of the journey the Lord has called us to make. We always have a choice: fear or faith.
As our lives continue to change and people who we love grow old and leave us, the show must go on! We must continue to rejoice and do good in the world and continue to have hope for the future in a cruel world that won't always love back. We must be willing to take risks and look like a fool from time to time.
After all, the love, encouragement and applause that we have been given doesn't go away just because we can no longer see it. Instead, it must get stored as fuel to take us through the rest of our journey.
As for today, I stop and reflect on the "folks" who have done countless "thankless" deeds throughout their life without the need for applause. Thank you what you do. I hope to become more like you.
I also praise Jesus for the gifts of love that he has given me through my family. These gifts continue to give.
Lastly, I chose to keep marching forward into the unknown with my Partner choosing "faith" again tonight, rejecting once more any thoughts of doubt or insecurity. Only through faith, we will have strength to continue to conquer fear.
I, self-admittedly, am not one of these folks.
I'm going to blame it on my parents for having me 10 years after my middle sister, 15 years after my oldest, thus making me the baby of the family.
I didn't grow up rich, but I was definitely spoiled rotten with attention. As a baby, my chubby thighs stayed bruised because people just couldn't resist squeezing them. My dad left for work every morning at 5AM for 30+ years, yet never missed a single ballgame and rarely a practice. Mom once got us kicked out of basketball game because she didn't like how the coach was yelling at me, and I lasted with my original Kindergarden teacher only one day when she opted to call me "Kathy," instead of Katherine on the first day of school. My sweet mama could go from a smiling Southern Belle to a scary Mama Bear in a split second- bless her heart.
With that being said, I have had to work on not being an overly-sensitive, "let's-take-a-selfie," self-indulgent, borderline narcissist, "why not me," and "I'm going to tell my mama," attention-seeking brat. (It's a work in progress.) I will toot my own horn and shamelessly do a dance in the end zone, while saying "in your face!" after winning a game of Monopoly. And I sometimes wonder why people don't like me?!?
Ok. That's not entirely true, as I cannot recall ever winning a game of Monopoly. I am, however, very competitive and like to be rewarded for my hard work and having an audience watch doesn't make me at all nervous.
In fact, I recall more embarrassing moments occurring in my life on a stage, basketball court or softball field with lots of people watching than those of bright, shining moments. For example, I once went in for a layup to only run straight into the rolling basketball rack with 10+ basketballs on it, making way for them to be completely scattered throughout the gym and for me to be face-planted on the gym floor with a gym full of people. This was the longest 10 mins of my life. I survived.
So back to this "need for attention" thing....it's not about a need for others or the world to watch me "succeed." It's truly not about being #1, "the best," or an insatiable desire for attention.
Not to get sappy, but what it actually boils down to is the dopamine rush I get when I look up and see that what I've done has made my biggest fans proud- my parents. That's what provides me the biggest sense of accomplishment and feeling of success. This need for approval has pushed me many times forward.
As we are creeping up on a little over a week away from the grand opening of Vinterest Antiques, I realize my biggest fans may not show up in the audience for the first time ever. It's not because they don't want to. It's just because they can't- physically. I have to be prepared for that.
And, at 35 years old, my friends, I realize that I am going to have to learn to give to myself the applause that I have relied on from family my entire life.
There are still people who won't like "Katherine" and there's still going to be jerks who think they can talk to me however they want. There are still bullies on the playground and life is much more populated with competitors than fans. I must come to grips with that there will never be any other person on this earth who will root for me, right or wrong, like my parents did.
I may still fall straight on my face, and people may point and laugh at me, and I am going to have to find the courage and strength to stand up on my own two feet and try again. No one in this life is going to come running anymore to protect me.
Alas! I must not forget that I have a wonderful partner in Paul.
I must also not forget that this fear and anxiety does not come from above. The noise and negativity and fleeting thoughts of doubt are not part of the journey the Lord has called us to make. We always have a choice: fear or faith.
As our lives continue to change and people who we love grow old and leave us, the show must go on! We must continue to rejoice and do good in the world and continue to have hope for the future in a cruel world that won't always love back. We must be willing to take risks and look like a fool from time to time.
After all, the love, encouragement and applause that we have been given doesn't go away just because we can no longer see it. Instead, it must get stored as fuel to take us through the rest of our journey.
As for today, I stop and reflect on the "folks" who have done countless "thankless" deeds throughout their life without the need for applause. Thank you what you do. I hope to become more like you.
I also praise Jesus for the gifts of love that he has given me through my family. These gifts continue to give.
Lastly, I chose to keep marching forward into the unknown with my Partner choosing "faith" again tonight, rejecting once more any thoughts of doubt or insecurity. Only through faith, we will have strength to continue to conquer fear.
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